RESPONSIBLE

It is important for children to develop into responsible, independent beings.

To encourage autonomy :

1. Let your children make choices. If you can offer a choice about when or how to do something, the child may have less resentment.

2. Show respect for a child's struggle. It is not helpful for you to say to your child that something is easy because if he succeeds, he has succeeded at an "easy" task.If he fails, he has failed at something easy. It is more helpful to suggest that "this can be hard" or that "sometimes it's helpful if…".

3. Don't ask too many questions. Your child may offer more information if you let him open up without bombarding him with questions.

4. Don't rush to answer questions. If you do this, you are doing the mental exercise for the child. Children often ask questions as permission to explore a topic, not for an immediate answer.

5. Encourage children to use a source outside the home to find information. It is helpful for children to learn that there are resources outside the home, and how to find and access them.

6. Don't take away hope. Much of the pleasure of life is dreaming, fantasizing, and hoping, so taking away the risk of disappointment by eliminating a child's dream is not always beneficial.

7. Let him own his own body.

8. Don't talk about your child in front of her, as if she is not there.

9. Let your child answer for herself.

10. Watch out for too many "No's". Instead of "no", sometimes give information,accept feelings, describe the problem, say yes if possible, or give yourself time to think.